No Nap Required

Levi fights me every day when I tell him it is time for the younger kids to take a rest.  Every day he passes out about 30 seconds after he lays down.

One afternoon the kids asked if they could watch a movie in my room instead of resting in theirs.  O.K., I said.  I needed to fold all the laundry that had accumulated in there.

I worked on the laundry for a little while and then went down stairs to figure out what we were going to have for dinner. 

Dave came home early and ran upstairs to change for baseball practice with the kids.

He found Levi asleep in one of the laundry baskets. No, he definitely did not need a nap:)

Today we have no where to go and I am going to get my laundry under control and clean my kitchen really good.  Does it mean you are to busy, or a little strange, when the idea of staying home and cleaning excites you so?

Any one else love a day to be left alone to clean and organize?

We Are The Champions!!!!

The Bulldogs won the league championship last night in a nail biter 2-1!

Now off to the District tournament!

Go Bulldogs!!!!!

(Do you notice how my child, Garrett, is the goofy one at the top still celebrating? I love that childs enthusiasm!)

The Tea

Each year we go to a Mothers Day tea at my moms church. It has become a tradition over the past four years. The girls and I always look forward to it.

Here is my beautiful 90 year old mother and her friend Yanika.  They were having a good time.

Grandma looked so cute in her hat.  We all were suppose to wear them.  I couldn't find mine.  I was the lone rebel in the group.

Samantha was irritated with me and refused to smile for the camera.  I can't remember why she was mad:)  May have been because we brought Levi with us.  The girls were not happy about this.  The tea is always a girls only event, however, the people at her church wanted to meet Levi and Amelia and grandma asked me to bring them.  Unfortunately the tea was during Amelia's nap so she stayed home.

Here I am on the left (hatless) with my sister Stacey, who was a good girl and followed the rules that mom gave us regarding the hat:)

Here is Paige telling Levi, again, not to take her picture.  She finally went and hid from him.  I love the hand on the hip and the scolding she is giving him here.  She looked so cute in her hat!Aunt Candy with her mouth full of food.  The gentlemen of the church served us, they had no idea what they were doing, it was very funny to watch.

We left after two hours because, as usual, one of the kids had a baseball game.  It was a fun afternoon, and I promise mom, next year I will remember my hat!

Spreading The Love Around?

The first month after we came home with Levi and Amelia I noticed that our other children were very receptive to their needs and trying to help out more to get them settled into our family.

At about the four week mark something changed.

I don't think I noticed it like I should have.

The older kids were feeling neglected.

All of my time was being taken up with caring for Levi, Amelia and Paige.  Paige demands attention so their was no way she was being left off this train.

Our oldest son went to most of his baseball games this season alone.  Dave was busy with Levi and Garrett's teams and I wasn't comfortable taking the kids out yet to large group gatherings.  I explained to him that this would pass after a few months and then things would get back to normal.

I thought all was fine.  Afterall, through out this childs 18 years of life I had only missed a handful of games.  His Dad or I were almost always at his games.

I guess this was the  problem.  He felt as if he had been replaced.

He made some comments to me about not being important anymore and I knew he was feeling the effects of this huge change in our lives.  My heart hurt because, of course, he was still very very important to us.

Garrett also needed more hugs and reassurance.  He would ask me if he could sit next to me, a spot that Levi usually demanded.  He was also feeling a little neglected and acting out in ways that were really not appropriate.

Even our beautiful 14 year old daughter had moments of jealousy, wanting to know why she had to share me all the time now with someone else?  She always had, but I guess it was different in her mind.

Now I don't want you to think that the kids were being selfish or braty all the time.  They weren't.  Just honest.

They love their new siblings and are very warm and affectionate with them.  I just don't think they understood how much of my time I would have to devote to the other children when they were first home with us.

I wish I had thought about this part more.  Prepared the children better for what was to come.

I think our transition has been almost perfect.  An answer to prayer.

However, I failed my older kids during this time.  They were feeling left out.  What could I have done differently?  I love all of our children so much and my heart hurts knowing they were in pain and not feeling like they could really share that with me.

I have seen a change in Garrett since I have been taking him with me as my special helper to the store and a few other places.  I have given him extra cuddle time and made sure to ask him about his day, etc.  So simple, yet unfortunately, overlooked.

Last night Tyler and I (he also showed some signs of feeling left out, telling me at one time I didn't love him anymore) went to Zach's last baseball game of the season.  It was about 30 minutes away and ended up being a double header.  We didn't get home until 11:00 p.m., but we had some great conversations.  We all laughed and joked around.  Definitely what the doctor ordered.

If I had it to do over again I would purposefully set time aside each day for the older kids.  I really thought they were fine.  I missed a lot of signs that they were not.

I guess this is just a reminder that no matter how old our kids get they still really need their Mom and Dad, no matter how much they protest that they don't.

Over the last few weeks things have really settled down at our house.  We are a family of 9 and truly do care about each other.  I have tried to make it clear that no one person is more important than another. I no longer allow Levi to monopolize all of my time.  I was doing something with Garrett and he kept interupting.  I told him to go and sit on the time out stool because I had told him I needed a few minutes with Garrett and that his turn was next.  He wasn't happy but Garrett got a big smile on his face and gave me a hug, happy to know again that he was important too.

As a result of this they don't seem to mind the extra time I have to spend with Levi on school and they all are getting along better.  Not so much pety squabling.  So simple, yet over looked by this clueless mom for a time.

Have any of you run into this situation with siblings?  What have you done to make all of your children feel special and loved?  I'm wondering how many of you who brought home older children ran into this situation?  It doesn't seem to happen as much with babies.  Though I think they are all tired of Amelia pulling their hair for fun:)

Outdoor Fun!

Amelia loves the sandbox.  She eats the sand which freaks Levi out.  I think it is good for her digestive system:)

She is pondering life here out amongst the garden...

The dog is always watching, making sure all the kids are safe.

Amelia taking a sip out of the dogs water bowl.  Gross!

Levi playing with Lincoln Logs right where Samantha had tried to escape for some peace and quite while she read.  Needless to say, she wasn't thrilled. 

Outdoor fun is the best.  I can't wait until the gloomy weather that has showed up the last few days disappears and summer arrives. 

Making Progress

Since Levi and Amelia have come home from Ethiopia they have been my constant companions.  Levi especially.  He used to get this panicked look in his eyes if he thought I was going to go somewhere without him.

As a result we have been at home a lot for the past four months.  I haven't minded.  I really like the slower pace.  However, I have a certain 11 year old who has not been so happy with this arrangement.

Garrett is used to me going to all his baseball games.  I have maybe been able to go to half this season.  Their games are late at night, usually around the other kids bed times, so I just haven't gotten there.  In the past I would have left the younger children with the teenagers so I could go to part of his game, however, I have not wanted to leave Levi or Amelia.

That all changed last night. 

Over the past few weeks I have made short trips to the market leaving Levi with Zach for half an hour or so.  He has been fine.  Always happy to see me when I return, and he usually calls me once just to check on me, but he has been fine.  He and Zach have a really sweet relationship and I am so thankful for that.

Well, last night was a big game for Garrett.  Their team is undefeated in the end of the season Division tournament and I knew he really wanted me to be there.  With no naps yesterday I knew the younger kids would be passing out early so I decided to try out my teenage sitters and see how it went.

I explained to Levi that Garrett's game was at 7:00 p.m. which was to late for him to go as he hadn't rested that day.  I told him Zach was staying home with him and that he and Paige and the other kids would watch a movie and then Zach would tuck him in bed just like mommy does.

He pouted a little but then said "You come home after Garrett's game?"

"Yes" I replied.

"You come in and give me kiss when you get home?"

"You bet", I told him.

He seemed fine.

So, I left a few minutes before 7:00 not at all sure how this would go.

I called at 8:00 and they were all happily laying on my bed, eating popcorn and watching The Rescuers.

Zach told me he went to bed with no problems after the movie except that he said he was a little scared to be in his room alone.  He is in there alone each night so I'm not sure if he was just feeling a little insecure or pulling Zach's leg:)  Any how Zach did the smart thing and let Paige sleep in there with Levi.

They both fell fast asleep in record time.

Garrett's team beat the #1 seated team 11-2 and Garrett pitched the last inning and a half of the game.  I am so glad I was able to be there with them.

This morning Levi gave me a big hug and said he had fun last night with Zach.  No pouting, no whining about why I left him.

Yes, I think we have turned a corner.  It's amazing what a little nurturing and love can do for a persons broken spirit.  I see Levi getting more confident and expressing his feelings so much more appropriately lately.  My heart truly burst with joy when I think how far we have come in these four months.

Amelia turned the corner weeks ago and is happy as long as one of her family members is with her, preferably Samantha, but she is really happy with any of us.  Strangers not so much.  Immediate family, she is great.   She is such a complete joy.  Of course, she likes mommy the best:)

On another note, Levi is loving playing baseball and hit a home run in his last game.  He is so enthusiastic and asks everyday when his next game will be. 

As I watched Tyler lying on the floor with Amelia playing the other night I had to smile as he told her how cute she was and how much he loved her.  Yes, these children have even melted my "sometimes" grouchy teenagers hearts.

If you are thinking of adopting an older child please don't be afraid.  The best advise I can give you is to pray, pray, pray and pray some more.  Ask God to place the children into your home that are meant for you.

I am so thankful that God answered my prayers in this area.  Yes, there have been struggles.  Lets face it, being a parent is HARD WORK.  Even for our biological children.  However, the rewards are in measurable.

Amelia finally got a couple of teeth.  See the bottom two peeking through?  So cute!

Hangin Out

We enjoyed our visit to the new church yesterday and I think we will go back. 

The rest of the day was spent cleaning and catching up on laundry.  I could barely walk down my upstairs hallway what with all the laundry lined up to be washed.  I'm starting to think each person in our house should just have two complete outfits that they trade off wearing each day.  How did we get so many clothes anyway? 

Around 5:00 we stopped the cleaning and got ready for our family movie night.  I went and picked up some pizza's and then we played the Wi for a while as a family.  Levi thought that bowling on the Wi was a blast.  We got a kick out of his excitement.  Amelia loved cheering when someone got a strike.  Those two kids have enriched our lives so much.  Even when Levi is saying "Mom, Mom, Mom" for the 100th time that day, I still thank God for the priveledge of being his mommy.  Now, if I could just teach the kid to say Dad now and then life would be perfect (just kidding, he says Dad quite a bit also:)

The younger kids hadn't had naps so they went off to bed at 7:30 and passed out in about 3 seconds.  I guess all that swimming and playing outside tuckered them out.

The older kids and Dave and I watched a cute movie.  O.K., I can't remember the title, but it was cute.

All in all a nice day. 

Happy Monday everyone!

Visiting

We are off to visit a new church this morning.

The church is sponsoring an Ethiopian family here in the U.S. while the father attends Bible College.  I thought Levi might enjoy meeting this family.  The church also takes yearly trips to Ethiopia and has a large sponsorship program in the country.

We know many people who attend this church and I have felt the pull to go and check it out.

Should be fun!

Never!

Paige had a bad dream a few nights ago. 

I went into her room to see what she was so upset about.  She kept saying, "No, no, please, I don't want to be adopted."

I woke her up and asked what she was dreaming about.

"Oh, mommy", she says "Please don't let someone adopt me.  I really like being in our family!"

Clearly I needed to explain exactly what adoption is.  She was very relieved to understand that she would always be a part of our family and that I would NEVER, NEVER let her go.

Isn't it funny how children process events?  I never would have guessed that my six year old would have been worried about this, or even had such a thought.

Kids.  You just never really know what they are thinking.

Mother's Day Escape

Two hours spent at the Greek cafe eating lunch and reading the Sunday paper.

A trip to Victoria's Secret for some much needed new undergarments.

A stroll through Best Buy to look at new dishwashers.  Decided to keep mine until it completely dies.

Four hours at Barnes and Noble looking at and reading books.

7:00 p.m.  come home to a clean house and a chocolate cake made for me by my sweet oldest daughter.

A day alone to refresh was just what the doctor ordered for this weary mama.

Coming home to the ones I love......................the best gift of all.

Thank You sweet children and hubby for giving me the precious gift of some  time alone.

Amazing how a little time to yourself can renew the spirit and mind.

TGIM

Thank Goodness it is Monday and a new week has begun.

Last week was full of arguments with the teenagers and me not feeling very well.  I have a stomach bug I just can't seem to shake.  I'm off to the doctor this week to see what is going on.

The warm laughter coming from the living room boads well for a better week.

One can hope, right?

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Update on Oceans:  We really liked the movie.  Levi was just amazed and it was soooo fun to watch him.  He may never want to go to the beach though.  In one scene a large whale beaches itself to grab a baby sea otter and then flips itself back into the water.  He is now sure that will happen to him if he stands in the surf.  It might take a while to convince him otherwise:)